How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
