Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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