I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
