Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
you would pick up someone in the library
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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