bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
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