if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
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