My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Randomize
