i just had sex bonerless
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
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