What tipped you off? The sombrero?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
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