Just cropdusted the office
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
