so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
When did angry sex become our thing?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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