I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
