I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
