Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
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