I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
My Sexting was not on an AP level
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
