i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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