The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize