Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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