New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize