so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
My life is pants optional.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
