Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
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