so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Randomize
