Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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