She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
