just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
