Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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