i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
