farters have to be the big spoon...
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize