I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
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.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
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So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
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