No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
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