...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
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