I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
