We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
You pole danced in your parka.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
