You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
