My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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