I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize