Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
