just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
