Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
handjob tips. give me some.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
