Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
