we made out on top of his cat.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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