did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
