My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
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