You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize
