Christians are straight up FREAKS
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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