Buhtt sex?
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Did I show you my penis last night?
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize