Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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