pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
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