Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
The air was thick with penises
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
