I have demons in me.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
