Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
