fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
