"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Randomize
